spectacular day

Today I took a "mental health" day as a lot of people seem to do.. so why couldn't I? :) I did. It was fan-tas-tic! I spent some sleeping time... I did an aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamazing meditation.. chakra healing.... and goodness was it healing... that is an experience I am always going to hold near and dear in my mind and heart. That definitely left an imprint..loved it <3. Then I got dressed in a cute outfit and went out with my mom... we ran some errands and got some food and then I got on my Enlightened Platypus coat and went out with Amanda to one of our favorite new shops... we talked with Karen of Eye of Nuit as well as Dave for quite a while about lots of lovely things... she gave us a sample of her first batch of candles! How sweet is she? This woman is so kind and lovely... If you're in the area definitely make a stop by her store.. it's worth it... Now I am home and showing off my new necklace from a co worker and enjoying my evening.. I'll be cleaning shortly. :D I am so excited... it may even be a smudging kind of night. Then again, that may wait... depends. :) I am in love <3

Dream..

I had a very weird dream this morning... first of all I was supposed to wake up at 6:05am with my alarm, but I shut it off and went back to sleep.. then I was supposed to wake up at 6:20 with my alarm.. I looked at it and went back to sleep.  On days where I know that I need to be awake I usually fight harder to stay up... but for some reason I was supposed to go back to sleep.  I had a crazy dream... it was a spiritual dream... it was an end of the world dream.. it was an amazing dream... in this dream I was able to fully communicate with and understand what animals were saying and feeling.. and I was able to comfort them.. I was with my family in this dream and animals I just met... the sky was dreary... it was like one of those days where the sky looks a weird, eerie color in between a dark grey and a yellow... there was a fog hanging in the air, but just above the buildings... it smelled like rain... and it smelled like the end. everyone knew the world was ending... we stayed with each other and all of our neighbors.. everyone had their doors open.. everyone was welcoming the end... everyone knew it was coming and everyone was calm... it was a weird dream, but i know that's how it will be when the end comes.. it will be calm, peaceful and where ever I am.. everyone will be accepting and waiting.. and loving and together... and it will have been an amazing life.. it is an amazing life, yes it is.

<3

I don't know how it happens..

.. it just does.

We all have those times in our life where we fade out.. we disappear for a little while, take a step back to reflect or to get away, or a number of other reasons.

One particular thing I step back from occasionally is my path.  I get scared and I don't know if I'm going in the right direction so I just stop moving and put that on hold.  Every time my little... voice of Fate sees that I have dropped something for so long, they knock on the door and say hey! YOU need to get back on the ball, try again it's ok everything will work out as it should. and i say 'ok, i'll go, but slowly' and I do.. and every time I do everything comes flooding back to me... my power is renewed... my understandings... everything is reawakened into a new light.. every time i step back in an ability becomes stronger for me... a different one each time and in it's right... at the time that it should.

Right now this thing is my ability to read Tarot and Oracle decks.  I put away my Raider Waite deck for a while and focused on an Oracle deck I have (and love)  because I just wasn't FEELING the Raider Waite. I felt too much pressure and I was forcing myself to love it, I was forcing myself to understand... when that wasn't right for me. So I put it on the back burner... and guess who came a'knockin? my dear voice of Fate and it said "hey.. look at those Raider Waite cards sitting right there next to you... now that you're in your room and peaceful, you should grab them and give a one card reading a try" and I said "You know what... I should!" and I did.. once about a week ago.  I shuffled and I chose my card the way that feels right to me.. I told myself "pick YOUR card Amanda, don't just pick any card" and I picked up a card.. I looked at it and it WAS my card. I think I posted about this because I couldn't believe it.. and my dear friends just told me that I did do this. Ok, so last night I decided I was going to try again. I put on my lovely incense and I took my Raider Waite deck out of the cloth and I shuffled... and I spread them across their cloth and I said "Amanda, pick YOUR card" I scanned the deck a time or two to make sure I knew it was my card and then I picked it up. Oh.. my... goodness.

I had NEVER seen this card before.. I used to look at all of the cards and practice reciting what the wands meant and what the cups meant and so forth and so on and I had even practiced the Major Arcana, but I had NEVER seen this card before. I looked at it.. and I said "wow.. this looks like a wise bunch... there's a lot going on here, but it's all organized.. everything in my life is settling right now. I've opened the right door and now I have all of these lovely animals to watch over me while I take my first step" I talked about what the card screamed at me... there were books... there were Egyptian symbols.. I was at home. at home I tell you.. and I still don't know how it happened... how I picked up MY card the first time.. and knew what it was saying.. and how I picked up MY card a second time and knew exactly what it was saying.. How does it happen?

I have NO idea, but I am going to embrace it. It's times like these where I feel my flame rekindle and I see myself running down that wooded path looking for what's next... it always pops right out at me when I least expect it *cue the banging on the wall in front of me* (yes, it really did just happen as I typed out "pops right out") Isn't life amazing..

And another note.. I was telling a dear coworker friend about a story.. I've talked about it here several times.. well, my coworker and I share some similar things that no one else in our work place share..  they're all spiritual things and one day I mentioned that when lights are my cue for things... if the lights are different than they were before or than I feel they should be... that's my sign. I know something is going on and I know what to do. She said the exact same thing is for her.. I thought that was so great. Well, while I was telling her my story and I talked about how I always get a sign when I talk about this story and as I said something else about uncertainty, the lights flickered in our store. we both started laughing and said "ahh... well then" hah.. it was amazing.. sharing that with someone.

Embrace life!! It's so amazing.. the little things are what help. and a new goal I have for today is going to be to remind myself to think of the little things when I'm feeling down. I get so down, but as soon as a little thing pops in my head I am good to go. Sometimes I try to push them out of my head though... which isn't good, so we'll try harder to accept the little things that come to me when I am sad. Let's do it! <3

<3 love!

Up, down, touch the ground

Hey..

This is an entry, but not something long or thoughtful. I am just so tired of my ups and downs... I will be so happy all day or content and then one little thing triggers my sadness and then i'm sad... and it takes something else to cheer me up. i'm out of commission. i don't like this. i miss happy.. real happy, where my heart sings and i am happy to be alive... where did it go?

An exciting thing..

Alright.. so I'm not sure how to start this post. :)

One of the things I always say is that "everything happens for a reason and as it should." I say this even more since I was attuned with Reiki, because it is important to know that energy will do what it is supposed to do and things will happen as they should.  I love when I'm going through my day and I see things unfolded in front of my eyes that are supposed to happen a certain way... and they do.

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A great example was Sunday while I was at work.  A lady came in with these HUGE fluffy boots on.. let me see if I can find a picture, wait.. nevermind I can't. Ok, well anyway, they were UGG boots that they stopped selling a few years ago, but she still has a pair and wears them out all the time.  I work in a shoe store, so talking about other shoe companies isn't really a good idea, but no one was in the store... we weren't very busy.  Ok, so we were talking about UGG boots and all these other fancy shmancy shoes that cost a lot of money when a guy walks into the store.  He looked completely lost, especially since we sell women's shoes and not men's. He comes up to me and asks if we sell UGG boots. I tell him no and that our mall does not sell them at all. Then the lady in the UGG boots walks over and helps him out to find out where he can find the boots.  When they started talking.. sparks flew for me, because it was the right place at the right time.  If I hadn't talked to her about those boots she would have left sooner and when he came in she would have been gone.. but she was there! and he was able to talk to her all about the boots and where to buy them.  I just love moments like that...

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I just love when that happens... I love it. I feel so revitalized and energized in those moments... I have this "YES!" moment where I am so excited. I had another moment like that recently, but it's slipped my mind.  I just think those are such magical moments... and I love when I am a part of them (though technically they are happening all the time, all day I just don't always pay attention to that).  Do you ever step into a room or get to a certain part of your day and feel this... twinkle in your heart or in anywhere? Where you know this is a great moment and you are where you were meant to be?

This is such a great thing to remember and keep in your pocket for rainy days. Just remember, you are in this moment, this place, this circumstance for a reason and sooner or later you'll find out why. :) Embrace the moment, celebrate life.

<3

Me

Another awesome blog!

I am posting here about a blog I check in with every week! You can find the blog at: http://bringingupsalamanders.blogspot.com/2011/01/2011s-first-giveaway.html

She is doing a give away right now and she has a few different ways that you can enter the contest!! She is super crafty and her blog is so full of light and love! :) Go check her out!! You won't regret it.

Take care,

Amanda

Palmistry blog

I was looking through blogger yesterday and I found this awesome blog about Palmistry! Go check it out at this link:

http://domesticwitch.blogspot.com/2011/01/palmistry.html?showComment=1296478850402#c2487656033497218221

I have always been interested in learning palmistry and this blog gave me some fun ideas for learning with friends. :) :) Go take a peek.

It's snowing

As I gaze out the window and witness these unique soft, gentle flakes of snow flying through the sky I become lost in a day dream.. remembering tales of yesterday... things of today.. what would it be like to be a snow flake? Recently I've been sleeping away from my altar, where I usually give my thanks, so I haven't been as diligent with talking to the God and Goddess at night, but I still know how important it is to give thanks.  This world is an amazing place... and things happen for a reason.. just like the snow flakes float through the sky, we float through our days... we encounter events that were meant for us as a snow flake encounters a building or object which they either land on or pass by. This life is.. an amazing treat. We keep going and going until life says "HEY YOU! You need a break" or until life says "you've been lazy and wasting around for way too long, it's time to get you a jolt of motivation to get movin and get your feet wet in this life" it's just... amazing. We could have been in this life at anytime.. been born into our current circumstances at any time, maybe we have lived this life once before, but that's the magic of it... we are here now because we are supposed to be.  It kind of makes me think... are we suposed to come about circumstances of suicide? suicide is osmething that most people have thought about at one point in their life... is that a circumstance that some people are meant to do? I don't know... people who survive their attempts often go on in life to amazing things and realize what htey woul dhave missed if they were successful.  I'm not sure why this thought tangent led to such a scary topic, but it did and I apologize for that if it's a disturbing thought. I just think it's interesting. The city is so busy, but the snow.. just slows you down, if you notice it... it's a breath of fresh air.. .an amazing gift to tell us that everything will be ok.  This is why I love my path... I have such an appreciation for the simple things... the finer things in life... and this path lets me embrace that even more.. it's all about Nature and observation and being in tune with the world around you.  I love that. That is who I am. I am an Eclectic Witch and couldn't be happier to be so.... I capitalized that for a reason. I just love this world.. I love it. it's so warm and welcoming and it's like coming home again every time another piece of the World pops into my eye and says "Hi!" I just love it...

Thank you dear World, Universe, Gods and Goddesses, Ancestors, Sun, Moon, Stars, North, South, East, and West, spirits of the past, Nature, the dear unique snowflakes reading this blog.. and to you, dear snowflakes outside the window. Thank you <3

Remember... you are here for a reason... you are a unique creation with a purpose... take the time to stop and observe... appreciate... and LOVE.  This world is amazing <3

Always,
Amanda

My mind

Is a wander right now... it's a drift in a snowy forest, zooming around and observing every inch of the snowy, icy master piece presented by Nature. It's having fun sailing up and down trees, bouncing through snow, and feeling the light snow flakes falling onto it.  My mind is a happy camper right now. It's imagining me prancing through the forest with my brand new coat on, that I'm still waiting to recieve in the mail.. the purples, blues, and silvers of it vividly passing through the trees.. with me leaving foot prints as I prance down the wintry path. I can see myself prancing through the forest from the eyes of a bird... perched up in the tree... I can hear myself giggle at the sight of the brown bark on a tree.. I can feel my senses strengthening as I listen dearly to the sounds of the forest and smell the crisp snow, feel the cold, hear the crunch beneath my feet. Gosh, it is paradise....


Do you have anything that you are absolutely drawn to? For me, I could spend my life in a forest.  I could sit next to a tree forever.. and ever.. and then some more evers.  I could just breathe in the crisp air perched up next to the tree, day dreaming and seeing myself prance around in my own mind.. that is home for me... I could also spend forever outside in the winter.  It is SO cold, but I can get over that to spend time outside.  I just love the snow.. I love the uniqueness of this time of year... I love the look, the taste, the touch... the sound.. the smell.. I love it. Gosh.. do I love it.

New goal

Well, today I am working on a new "goal." I think it's great to start out every day or every week with a challenge.  Today/this weeks' challenge for me is to STOP hating my internship.
Issues: no activities to do, limited supervision, lots of bored time
Problem: HATE coming in
Solution:???

I have to solve this problem quickly because I am going to try to arrange my schedule so I can come in here four days a week in order to complete my hours faster.  I have to find more things to do and more ways to stay focused and entertained so that I don't go nuts and stop coming in to my internship, which I MAY do. I've already missed 2 weeks of this due to illness, so who knows.

Have you ever had a situation like this? Where you HAVE to do something day in and day out that you just absolutely HATE doing? How did you solve that problem?

I am trying to go back to see how I solved similar situations in the past.  The only thing I can think of is when I was at another internship like this and I started finding ways to help teachers.  My only fear with that is I am in a social work internship and I don't want my supervisor to be upset with me for doing tasks other than "social work" tasks. I want to talk to my supervisor, but I am afraid she is going to bog me down so much that I won't be able to handle it.  We'll see, right? It's just odd that on average I am busy 3 periods per day.  Everyone always thinks I'm doing something important because I'm always typing a lot, but really I'm just updating my blog or typing an email. I just... love to type so I do it fast and often.

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On another note. I am in a group that does really nice Rituals for each holiday and they sent an email through the group trying to decide about when the Ritual for Imbolc will be.  Unfortunately I can not attend because I have work on weekends, but it was nice seeing emails from people that I miss VERY much.  Then, one of my dear friends sent an email checking in on me.  It was really nice to see.  and I had exciting news to share!

Do you ever have one of those moments spiritually where something just clicks? You can feel the energy of the moment and you're soul screams "THIS IS RIGHT!!" I had one of those the other day.  I was using my tarot cards, which I don't often use... I usually go to my oracle deck, but I can't find them at the moment.  (I think the house Fairies have something to do with that). I pulled out my Raider Waite deck, which is wrapped nicely next to my bed.. I shuffled and I pulled the card that felt right. WOWEE! I pulled a card and I looked at it before I referenced the guide book.  I said exactly what came to mind when I saw the card and I reviewed it in my mind. Then I said "that makes a lot of sense! I think this is good." and I looked in the book and nearly the exact description I JUST said, was IN THE BOOK!!!! Trusting my intuition has always been an issue for me.. and when I opened that book... my soul said "THIS IS RIGHT!! You got this!!" and I was so proud of myself.  The last time I had one of those moments it was during an amazing Moon ritual I did in my room.  I hadn't practiced for a while and I opened my circle and was ready to start Ritual when I got this overwhelming energy and I was filled with estatic, excited emotions.  My soul said "THIS IS RIGHT!!" and I was happy.. I finished Ritual knowing that this is where I belong . Every time I doubt something, I think back to my "THIS IS RIGHT" moments and then the World is good again.

Aren't those just the most magical times of all?

Makes you love your place in this World just a little bit more! :)

Brightest Blessings to you and yours,

<3 Amanda

An entry.... tomorrow

I was going to type out my entry tonight, but I am SO tired and have to be up in a few hours... so this will have to wait til I am up and moving around tomorrow. :) <3

Dwelling on the past and future

OK, so I learned one thing today.  You can not completely cut past and future thoughts out of your life. Everything you do is because of the past or for the future... so I couldn't just STOP talking about things because if I said "i am doing this for group today" then I'm talking about the future, but I have to.

But. I did stop thinking about past and future things that overwhelmed me.  If i noticed my mind going to a past or future thing that wasn't relevant to the present, I directed my thoughts back to that present second. It worked all day for the most part. :) I'm happy about it. I had a good time with it. :) The mind is a powerful tool..

Brightest Blessings!

Love,

Amanda

Have you ever?

Have you ever felt that it's not the right time? I follow a large amount of blogs, like I think most people do and after not keeping up with them for so long I have a long list of them to read.  I never read all of the blogs I've missed, but I always scroll down to see if something catches my eye. Today I scrolled and scrolled and something told me "don't stop, you're not there yet" so I didn't. What did I find? An amazing, amazing... site that was posted in a blog I read. It was suggested if you're feeling down and well.. I was like "hm.. I'm skeptical" WOW. Was I wrong. I can't even remember what blog I saw it on now, because I am so blown away by this website and how it came into my life at the perfect time! It's the answer to everything I've been looking for lately. THE answer. and I need to tell you about it, so you can go check it out. HURRY, click the link! go NOW! and tell me what you think... I am just in awe.. and amazement... I almost forgot that I have to leave here in a few minutes because I was so.... inspired by this site... I feel so at home right now that I don't know what to do! Help me!! hah... What an amazing day... My goodness. Please check out this site.

http://www.goddessguidebook.com

click it!!!

Love,

Me~

Quote

This was a funny quote I just saw in a newsletter I read:

"These days, the witches are hardly old crones with twisted noses. They've got fishnets and you'd just want to jump in their cauldrons." -John Majdoch.


You can sign up for the newsletter here:


http://exclusivemagick.com/

Just go to "free newsletter" on the top bar! It's such a great little email newsletter that Lyn and Paul send out weekly.  I know they used to alternate weeks on who wrote the newsletter, but I am not 100% sure if that's still how it works.  The stories they post are always so interesting and I learn so much week to week from them! :) Check it out!

Love,

Me

Staying in the NOW

Wow. Isn't that hard? Focusing on this second only? We have the capacity to think about the future and the past and the present, but each can overwhelm us an incredible amount if we dwell upon it for too long. Today is my first day back to internship and then later today, class.  I am so overwhelmed by it all since I have missed so much time and I am trying VERY hard to stay in the now.  I would much rather panic about class than be doing what I am doing here.  The tricky thing I always noticed about my internship is that if I try to do homework here I always end up sleepy and have a lot of trouble staying awake, so I must not do reading homework here.  Unfortunately, that's most of my homework. If I had realized I had homework while I was sick, then I would have read up on things and taken charge, but I didn't. And in a split second I'm already focusing on the future and past... see how hard it is? I'm going to REALLY challenge myself today to stay in the present all day.  It might be a good challenge... I'll write about how the day went tonight, when it's over (once again.. I'm in the future).

Right now

I posted this in my other journal.. but I wanted to post it here too.

I should be sleeping... instead I'm hoping again for something that is a far off dream.  I'm talking to my dream boy via text and he sends me a text that says "I'm tired come hold me." Why...? I was fine just talking to him before that, but that makes me MISS him. I was thinking all day about him... I find myself thinking about him ALL day every few days. I can't talk to other guys... this is why I can't. I am pulled back in every time I hear from this boy. E-V-E-R-Y T-I-M-E. I love it, but I hate it. I think one of the main things is that... when we kissed. It was like no other kiss I have EVER experienced.  I haven't kissed many people in my short lifetime.. and I don't plan on kissing many more (outside of family, of course).. This was the most amazing kiss I have EVER dreamed of having. Maybe he's just a guy and knows his cards? Maybe I'm being tricked and pulled into something that I shouldn't be pulled into.  It was just... so odd because we both kissed the exact same way. I'm a vixen, let me tell you, and I have a way of kissing.  I have a science to it. I know what I'm doing in that field.. and I just never thought I could kiss someone who did the exact same way again. I just could not believe it. I think I'm still blown away by that... and how cute he was... if I kissed him while he was driving he would turn to me with the cutest little face and say "kiss me again! do it, do it, pleeeaaaseee" and would whine until I would.. and he would look at me instead of the road, which is dangerous.. so I would. He just CALMS my soul. calms me completely... just seeing him.. talking to him about anything.. I feel so relieved. Everything is going to be ok as long as he is there... my sister may think he's weird, but I think he's just like me. i know he's just like me... I feel like I'm not complete without him now.. since I met him. My great grandmother sent me him... I know she did after she passed away. I know she did. Is it too much of a dream? Am I caught in something lethal? Will this ever come to a new road.  Am I passing the new road? He always comes back...  I thought if I just stopped talking to him for a while everything would be ok, but it's not.. he always comes back. He ALWAYS messages me.  If I haven't talked to him in a while he will message me and ask why I haven't talked to him.  We don't even talk a lot... just a little bit.. It makes me want to cry... I know if he would just open up again it could be re-kindled. Or should it be? Is this just a friend thing? Am I just nuts? Am I crazy for thinking this? I don't know.  Did you ever say your bf or gf or sig. others name with yours to hear how it sounded? I always thought I would know when it was right for sure by that.  Mrs. Amanda ______. Amanda and Brandon.. I just think that sounds so right. Don't you? I don't know.. maybe no one will read this.  I am just lost right now.  I've been lost on this for a few years now... do I stay or do I go? I'm not sure... I do know that I should be getting ready for bed, but I'm typing this entry... and thinking about someone who is sleeping... in another state. I wish we were closer, so I could just FIND out for sure. I get so shy around him and so nervous though... and I feel like I look like such a slob now. I'm broken. He was right, he broke me. I never met someone who was SO similar to me... so I just... freaked out and broke. I don't know how to be me again. Am I me? Is this thought hindering who I am? Is this thought what's messing me up? Thinking that I'm not me... I've had readings done and they all say that I have a fog. I do. It's true... God. I just WANT to be with him. everyday... every night.. I want him. so bad. come on life, please give me a sign... Every person I know who is in a bad relationship meets a great person and then gets married and has the best time of their life. I thought this was like that... it has to be... If not, I'm lost... why couldn't that be me? Happy... It's been 2 years.. I think. Wow. It'll be 3 years since I broke up with my ex in 2 days. Wow. Time flies, huh? yep. I've changed a lot. for better or for worse.

Time for some helpful dreams and some thanks to the Universe...

Thank you.

Love Always,

amanda

this reminds me of a  thought... it's supposed to be easy. This isn't easy. 

Reality Check

wow... talk about the power of dreams.  I've been in this funk since I've been sick for a week and a half and my dream just BROKE that.  I am feeling 80% better and ready to take charge again! OK, so in my dream the overall message was "you make your decisions, you are an adult" ok. So all my friends and family were in this dream and a new girl I was meeting. She seemed disatisfied with me because I had so many excuses for things.  Then I realized "that was my choice" those things I did were my choice.  So, I can either lay in bed and feel sick and miss classes forever or I can get up and get going again.  It's MY choice. and I chose to get up and get going.

In the time I've been sick I have been praying nightly, I've been using Reiki on myself for healing, I've been saying my Reiki ideals day and night (except today, i was too excited and forgot). I've been saying thanks and I've been doing everything I said I would.

Everyday I want to leave my house with fairy dust trailing from me, with the ground under my feet, and with new visions and insights along the way.  I am so excited for this. I am SO excited.   Things are changing right now <3

What an amazing life

I recently had a "Spiritual Path" reading done by Maia of Twinflame Treasures at Etsy.com. (URL at end of post). It was the most amazing reading I have ever had.  Since then I am doing some serious thinking, thanking, meditating, creating, exploring... and any other -ing you can imagine.

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Today I came to a re-realization.  You have to embrace the gifts you are given.. even if sometimes it seems no one shares your qualities or treats you teh same way.. it doesn't mean you should stop.  Embrace YOU! You are made this way for a reason. I have a detail oriented personality.  I embrace the little things of everyday life and I used to be the happiest person in the world because of this, but I let it slip away due to peer pressure. Never loose yourself like that.  I'm re-embracing my detail oriented self and I am going to love being me all over again.  Taking care of others because that's what I was made to do... listening to the spirits and voices of the World, because they talk to me.. Enjoying every second of life because that's what it's here for.  Life is a gift... embrace it.  Life will be here regardless, but it's best you embrace your gifts in the time you can. :)

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I am feeling so great about this.  I have even started giving myself Reiki every night like I should be and I've been working with the animals in my house as well.  Soon I am going to get up the courage to ask my brother and his girlfriend if they'd mind trying it out. I'm going to break through my fears one at a time to clear this storm out. I've started saying my Ideals day and night... and embracing everything.

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I used to think that my time would come and I used to work my hardest because I knew it would pay off if even in the simplest ways, but I let that go.  Now I'm going to do that again.  Work my hardest all the time.  Time is here now for me and I'm going to enjoy that time. :) Go for a walk, venture through an un-charted pasture, meditate like I never have before, celebrate the holidays in a whole new way.  It's a new day! Remember that and embrace that.  I think I've got some little glittery friends hanging out right now too which is just lovely! :D Thank you guys for coming.  I know I see you every once in a while out of the corner of my eye. Thanks for that glimpse. I appreciate it. <3

Take care everyone and Brightest of Blessings!!

Love, me

Etsy URL where I received my reading: http://www.etsy.com/shop/TwinFlameTreasures

My Etsy shop: {I just made a banner for the store!! Tell me what you think! (: } http://www.etsy.com/shop/When1Angels4cry